What defines Love?


There is one thing in each of our lives that affects us in some fashion regardless of how we might try to avoid it, fail to understand it, or seek to find it.

It can be illusive, it can be mystifying, it can be frustrating, it can creep up on you unexpected. It amazes us, it brings us great happiness and unbearable heart ache. This wonderful, powerful, thing is not a person, it’s not physical, it’s certainly not something you’ll see or meet, yet it lives in each of us, can be very physically expressed, and you see it on peoples faces every day and meet it every time you find two people in love.

Love. Only four letters. Such a simple word, but one of the most complex emotions know to man. It is something we all crave, something we need, a feeling we require almost as much as we need food or water to live.

Yet as much as we need it, it is not something common to find. It is something we mistake too easily, a feeling we share too freely, an emotion we abuse, take for granted and lose far too much. It’s something that when we have it we are blissfully happily, and when we find ourselves without it experience feelings of loneliness that makes life quite unbearable.

What is it about love that makes it such a domineering emotion for mankind? Why do we need it so?

I think if we were all to list our personal reason for its importance in our lives, it would be interesting to see the different levels that love impacts our lives on every level. I also think that we’d do well to see the variety of reasons that we present for its importance as part of the reason for its complexity. You see, everyone views love through different eyes. We all have different expectations, our needs, insecurities, dependencies, curios traits, funny habits and a whole list of other factors of each persons personality that makes love one of the biggest things of our lives.

Some would say that you only have one shot at true love. Others would argue that you can find love anywhere if you look hard enough. I believe that a lot of people hide behind the word for a variety of selfish reasons. Some will tell you that real love arrives when you find your soul mate, and yet more would try convince you that love is all about learning to love.

But what is it about love? I mean come on…. What is all the fuss about?

The truth? We are not designed to survive without it. A human man, a woman, a child…. We cannot survive without love.

As a child we learn love through the expression of those around us. Mainly from our parents, but in some cases from others that show us time, care about us, and makes us feel warm, safe and special. We learn to feel comfortable in love. It brings us happiness, acceptance, safety, companionship and possibly most importantly gives us a sense of identity. Knowing someone cares that much for us kindles a fire within us. It’s these feelings that drive us. We all want to feel them at every level of our lives, especially from our peers, from our friends, from the people we like, the people we choose to spend time with. Without these feelings where would we be?

Love can be expressed in many ways, but which ever way we receive it, there is something about it that is special for each one of us, and these are the feelings we crave the most. So next time your thinking about love, just stop and ask yourself what it is that makes love special for you. I think you’ll find it’s not an easy question to answer, but taking a moment to try understand it gives us a completely new appreciation for it.

Thought for today – “You can close your eyes to the things you don’t want to see, but you can’t close your heart to the things you don’t want to feel.” – Johnny Depp

Song for today – Caribbean Blue by Enya

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